Contest #162: December 20th, 2002 to January 9, 2003


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The winning entry was submitted by Jack Meaph. It was:

 This is Bryan Turner. He works as a customer service representative by day, but studies witchcraft by night. Here we see him conjuring up an evil spirit from a cardboard box. If you think that's something, you should have seen the evil spirits he conjured up in the bathroom last week. It was so evil in there, none dared to enter for three days.
 

Some of the others (in no particular order):

  1. At wizardry school we like to practice on boxes before trying to posses the souls of living people. (Adam Lee)
  2. One day after a UPS mysteriously exploded next to him, Brian Turner discovers that he now has the amazing power to attract useless garbage. However, his plans to become a super hero are dashed when he is crushed beneath a tidal wave of Jehovah's Witnesses and personal injury lawyers, drawn to him by his newly acquired abilities. (Stephen Head)
  3. "Here we see Bryan Turner having fun with all the shredded 'When's DNF coming out?' fan-letters." (Dan Polsrod)
  4. Bryan shows off his new Jedi Mind Trick. (Leon Durham)
  5. They're free ! The paper fairies are finally free !" thought Bryan contentedly to himself before wondering if the 23 hour work days were starting to have an effect on him. (William Barton)
  6. Gandalf the Great Box Unpacker. (Keith Green)
  7. "The boxes keep spitting the copies of Xenophage out as fast as I put them in!" (Stephen Head)
  8. I unveil my latest sim gaming masterpiece! Sim-Enron! Fear me now, Maxis! (Trey Mageluzzo)
  9. Double, double toil and trouble;
    Fire burn, and cauldron bubble.

    Fillet of PigCop,
    In the cauldron boil and bake;
    Eye of Assault Trooper and toe of Alien Drone,
    Wool of Assault Captain and tongue of Overlord,
    Octobrain's fork and Protozoid's sting,
    Enforcer's leg and Commander's wing,
    For a charm of powerful trouble,
    Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.

    Double, double toil and trouble;
    Fire burn and cauldron bubble.

    Cool it with the Queen's blood,
    Then the charm is firm and good.
    O well done! I commend your pains;
    And every one shall share in the gains;
    And now about the cauldron sing,
    Live elves and fairies in a ring,
    When it's done... When it's done... (Stephen Correia)

In reality, this is Bryan Turner putting some packing materials into a box in our motion capture room when we were packing up to move offices in November 2002.