------------------------------- Commander Keen The Really Big "Unofficial" Commander Keen FAQ by Dave Allen flaose@classicgaming.com Version 1.99 06/02/03 ------------------------------- ------------ Introduction ------------ Hello, and welcome to my Commander Keen FAQ. I hope that by the time you finish reading this, you will have a vast knowledge of Commander Keen, his universe, and a few cold, hard facts, without starting to foam at the mouth and babble senseless phrases (except, perhaps, Shikadi). If you are prepared, read on brave soldier. Table of Contents *[1] General Information [1.1] General Disclaimer and Legal Stuff [1.2] Who am I? [1.3] Why am I writing this? [1.4] Who made the Commander Keen games? [1.5] Wasn't there another Commander Keen FAQ? [1.6] Will there be more Commander Keen games? [1.7] Why play Commander Keen? [1.8] Where can I get Commander Keen? [1.9] What is Shareware? [1.10] What's up with id, 3D Realms and Monkeystone? [1.11] Can I contact Apogee/3D Realms for hints? [1.12] A note on Pirating [1.12.1] What is Pirating? [1.12.2] What I've accidentally pirated a game? [1.12.3] Is there anywhere I can report pirating? *[1.13] Who can distribute this FAQ? *[1.14] Revision History [2] Commander Keen's Universe (Also Known as The Meat) [2.1] Who or what is Commander Keen? [2.2] What games has Commander Keen starred in? [2.3] Who are Commander Keen's friends? [2.3.1] Marooned on Mars [2.3.2] The Earth Explodes [2.3.3] Keen must Die! [2.3.4] Keen Dreams [2.3.5] Secret of the Oracle [2.3.6] Aliens ate my Babysitter! [2.4] Who are Commander Keen's enemies? [2.4.1] Marooned on Mars [2.4.2] The Earth Explodes [2.4.3] Keen must Die! [2.4.4] Keen Dreams [2.4.5] Secret of the Oracle [2.4.6] The Armageddon Machine [2.4.7] Aliens ate my Babysitter! [2.5] What are the worlds Commander Keen visits? [2.6] How does Commander Keen get around? [2.7] What goodies can I pick up on my journeys? [2.7.1] Marooned on Mars [2.7.2] The Earth Explodes [2.7.3] Keen must Die! [2.7.4] Keen Dreams [2.7.5] Secret of the Oracle [2.7.6] The Armageddon Machine [2.7.7] Aliens ate my Babysitter! *[2.8] What's the name of Keen's pet yorp? *[2.9] What's this I hear about Billy Blaze's extended family? *[2.10] What is this 'dopefish'? [3] The Official Commander Keen Games and Story's [3.1] What's the Story Behind Invasion of the Vorticons? [3.1.1] Marooned on Mars [3.1.2] The Earth Explodes [3.1.3] Keen must Die! [3.2] What's the Story Behind Keen Dreams? [3.3] What's the Story Behind Goodbye, Galaxy!? [3.3.1] Secret of the Oracle [3.3.1] The Armageddon Machine [3.4] What's the Story Behind Aliens ate my Babysitter!? [4] Lyrics [4.1] What are the Lyrics to Eat Your Veggies? [4.2] What are the Lyrics to Aliens ate my Babysitter!? [5] The Standard Galactic Alphabet [5.1] What is the Standard Galactic Alphabet? #[5.2] What do all the Signs Say? #[5.2.1] Marooned on Mars #[5.2.2] The Earth Explodes #[5.2.3] Keen must Die! #[5.2.4] Keen Dreams #[5.2.5] Secret of the Oracle #[5.2.6] The Armageddon Machine #[5.2.7] Aliens ate my Babysitter! *[6] The Hints, Tips, and Other Funny Things [6.1] What are some Hints for Invasion of the Vorticons? [6.1.1] Marooned on Mars [6.1.2] The Earth Explodes [6.1.3] Keen must Die! [6.2] What are some Hints for Keen Dreams? [6.3] What are some Hints for Goodbye, Galaxy!? [6.3.1] Secret of the Oracle [6.3.2] The Armageddon Machine *[6.4] What are some Hints for Aliens ate my Babysitter!? *[7] The Codes [7.1] What are the Codes for Invasion of the Vorticons? [7.2] What are the Codes for Keen Dreams? *[7.3] What are the Codes for Goodbye, Galaxy!? [7.4] What are the Codes for Aliens ate my Babysitter!? [8] The Maps #[8.1] What's the Layout of Marooned on Mars? #[8.2] What's the Layout of The Earth Explodes? #[8.3] What's the Layout of Keen must Die!? [8.4] What's the Layout of Keen Dreams? #[8.5] What's the Layout of Secret of the Oracle? #[8.6] What's the Layout of The Armageddon Machine? #[8.7] What's the Layout of Aliens ate my Babysitter! [9] The Endings [9.1] What's the Ending to Marooned on Mars? [9.2] What's the Ending to The Earth Explodes? [9.3] What's the Ending to Keen must Die!? [9.4] What's the Ending to Keen Dreams? [9.5] What's the Ending to Secret of the Oracle? [9.6] What's the Ending to The Armageddon Machine? [9.7] What's the Ending to Aliens ate my Babysitter!? *[10] The End of it All [11] Acknowledgments * = New or changed in this version # = Forthcoming ------------------------ *[1] General Information ------------------------ And in the beginning, God created Heaven and Earth, and Lawyers. Therefore, thou shalt have legal stuff in order. Dig in, while it's warm. [1.1] General Disclaimer and Legal Stuff I AM NOT AN EMPLOYEE OF 3D Realms ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY, APOGEE SOFTWARE COMPANY, ID SOFTWARE COMPANY, OR MONKEYSTONE GAMES. THIS FAQ IS DONE IN MY RECREATIONAL TIME, OBEYING ALL LAWS THAT PERTAIN TO MY PLACE OF RESIDENCE. I AM IN NO WAY RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY ERRORS I, OR ANYONE ELSE HAS MADE. COMMANDER KEEN IS A REGISTERED TRADE MARK, AND COPYRIGHT OF ID SOFTWARE. ALL OTHER COPYRIGHTS AND TRADEMARKS ARE PROPERTIES OF THEIR RESPECTIVE OWNERS. USED WITHOUT PERMISSION. I AM IN NO WAY LIABLE FOR ANY HEALTH EFFECTS CAUSED BY THE READING OF THIS DOCUMENT, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO: CONGESTIVE HEART FAILURE, BLINDNESS, VOMITING, NAUSEA, DIARRHEA, INDIGESTION, HEARTBURN, BLOATING, CONSTIPATION, STARVATION, AND MALNUTRITION. THIS FAQ MAY BE DISTRIBUTED IN ANY FORM AS LONG AS: A) IT IS BY NO COMMERCIAL WEBSITE OTHER THAN THOSE EXPRESSLY LISTED IN SECTION [1.14] B) IT IS IN ORIGINAL AND UNEDITED GLORY, C) CREDIT IS GIVEN TO ME, THE AUTHOR, D) IT IS THE MOST CURRENT VERSION PERTAINING TO THE DISTRIBUTOR'S KNOWLEDGE, E) NOTHING IS CHARGED FOR IT (BUT I'M PRETTY SURE NO ONE WOULD PAY MONEY FOR THIS). FOLLOW THE SHAVED BLUE GONADS. BY THE WAY, IF YOU'RE ACTUALLY STILL READING, YOU'VE GOT WAY TOO MUCH TIME ON YOUR HANDS, AND THERE'S WAY MORE INTERESTING STUFF TO READ. GET GOING! [1.2] Who am I? My name is Dave Allen, known to most of the Internet community as Flaose (flay-oase). I'm Canadian, that's all you need to know. But enough about me, how are you? [1.3] Why am I writing this? I am writing this for two reasons: 1) The official Commander Keen FAQ by Bill Amon was okay, but it wasn't very comprehensive, I think a FAQ should be the only thing you need to find out about a certain subject (e.g. Commander Keen). 2) I don't think I've made a great enough contribution to the Commander Keen society, but this is it, The Big One. [1.4] Who made the Commander Keen games? As far as I know, the people who worked on the Commander Keen games are the Programmers, John Carmack, John Romero, and Jason Blochowiak, Adrian Carmack (he's not related to John, really!), doing the Artwork. Creative Director Tom Hall, whom all other Creative Directors fear because of all his great ideas, Jay Wilbur, the CEO dude, and Bobby Prince, the guy who composed the music for Commander Keens 4 - 6. [1.5] Wasn't there another Commander Keen FAQ? Yes, the Official Commander Keen FAQ was from a guy named Bill Amon. Refer to section [1.3] Why am I writing this for more details. [1.6] Will there be more Commander Keen games? I'll quote 3D Realms' Web Dude, Joe Siegler on this one, `If you played Keen 5, there was a screen that said something to the effect of "Join us in December 1992 for the greatest Keen adventure yet". There was a picture of Keen smiling, with a Santa Claus hat on. At the time, id Software was intending to do a third series of Commander Keen, tentatively entitled "Commander Keen: The Universe is Toast". However, other projects came up (Wolfenstein 3D, Spear of Destiny, and later, Doom). There are no plans now to do more Keen. The main reason for this is that id Software owns the rights to Commander Keen, and any new project would have to be either done by them directly (EXTREMELY unlikely), or at least approved by them. At this time, there are no Keen games under development by Apogee, id, or Monkeystone (where Tom Hall & John Romero now work as of 2001). If and when there ever is more Keen, it will be state of the art of whatever technology is current at the time. In December of 1998, Tom Hall has stated his interest in making future games based on his character Keen and his universe, but only if he owned the rights to Keen, which is also unlikely.' Also, don't bug id Software about giving the license away, it'll just make them more possessive, and they won't give it up, and we'll never have any more Commander Keen Games, and it'll be All Your Fault! So don't do it, okay? Since the last version of this FAQ, a new Keen game was released, simply called 'Commander Keen', this mediocre game was released for the Gameboy Color. Tom Hall, the creator of Keen, had nothing to do with it. It was developed by David A. Palmer Productions. [1.7] Why play Commander Keen? Commander Keen is an in depth and complex side-scrolling game (well, that first part might be stretching the truth), in which you control a cute little eight year old through dozens of levels, to finally complete your goal. After every game, the plot thickens a little more. It's also a very fast game; literally, it runs at around 40 frames per second, compare that to the original Quake. It is also a tense experience, one hit to keen, and he's dead. Hilarity is everywhere, usually encoded, but still there. What are you waiting for? Head over to Cerebral Cortex 314 page at http://www.classicgaming.com/cc314/, and download shareware! [1.8] Where can I get Commander Keen? You can order Episodes 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5 directly from 3D Realms at their website, http://www.3drealms.com/, by phoning 1-800-GAME123, or by mailing to Apogee Software Productions P.O. Box 476389 Garland, TX 75047-6389. You can get Keen Dreams from Softdisk Publishing. Episode 6 is only available from id Software, when you buy the id Anthology (Discontinued), which includes all the works of id Software, up to Quake. Please only download Commander Keen episodes 1, and 4, and the Demos of episode 6 and Keen Dreams (available at Cerebral Cortex 314, http://www.classicgaming.com/cc314/), since only they are part of the Shareware concept. Speaking of which... [1.9] What is Shareware? Originally, the term shareware described a full-blown software product that relied on user's honesty (and pocketbooks) to support the author. Understandably, most shareware was a commercial failure; why register when you have the full product already. Knowing this, Scott Miller came up with a new shareware strategy to market his game 'Kingdom of Kroz' ('I have this cunning plan' he said / as he lay upon his bed): He would release an 'episode' of the game to the unsuspecting gaming public. If the consumer liked the game, they could pay a fee to register it, and receive the remaining 'episodes' and therefore more excellent gameplay. It was a 'try before you buy' system, if you will. Needless to say, Kroz was a commercial success, and it revolutionized the shareware industry. This became known as the 'Apogee Model', and was the precursor to the playable demos that are regularly released by gaming companies these days to entice players to purchase their games. [1.10] What's up with id, 3D Realms and Monkeystone? id Software was the company who developed Commander Keen, Apogee Software, now known as 3D Realms, published it. However, they had a falling out around the time of DOOM, id Software said Apogee wasn't serious enough about their business. Monkeystone is the company that Tom Hall, the creator of Commander Keen, and John Romero, a programmer of the Commander Keen series, work for. id, Apogee, and Monkeystone are related in no other business way. [1.11] Can I contact Apogee/3D Realms for hints? You can ask for hints, if you have registered the games! Hints can be received by phoning (972) 278-5655, Monday through Friday, between 8:00am and 6:00pm CST, or by writing to Apogee Software at P.O. Box 496389, Garland, TX 75049-6389. [1.12] A note on Pirating Arr me maties. With pirating ye are squandering it all. [1.12.1] What is Pirating? Pirating is the unlawful breaking of the copyright of a game, by giving away, or selling it without removing the original copy from your computer. So say I just got Commander Keen 3, and I give it to my friend, than my friend gives it to three of his friends, who each give it to three of their friends, and so on and so on. In the end, 3D Realms will have lost perhaps thousands of dollars. Now imagine if everyone does it. Companies will have to start laying off workers, which means crap games that take years to complete. Eventually, the industry will be no more, and we wouldn't want that, would we? [1.12.2] What I've accidentally pirated a game? Hey, it happens. However, make sure you buy the game promptly from the store or company. Your conscience will be clear, and your favorite game company will still be able make more great games. Hey, everybody wins! [1.12.3] Is there anywhere I can report pirating? Of course! You can phone the Software Pirating Association (SPA) at 1- 800-338-PIR8, or 3D Realms at 1-800-3D Realms. *[1.13] Who can distribute this FAQ? Permission is granted to any non-commercial website to distribute this FAQ, provided they follow the rules set out in section [1.1]. Only the following commercial websites may distribute this FAQ: http://www.3drealms.com/ http://www.classicgaming.com/ http://www.gamefaqs.com/ http://www.cheats.de *[1.14] Revision History v.0.98b (??/??/??): Original version, edited by me. v.0.99b (??/??/??): Controlled Release v.1.00 (12/10/99): First Public Release! It's actually a FAQ! A few minor changes. v.1.01 (12/18/99): A very minor change. Unreleased v.1.10 (01/25/00): Removed some material, updated section [1.6] Will there be more Commander Keen games? v.1.99 (06/02/03): (This Version, and probably the last) Less is More! Entire Text Updated and converted to .txt file for universal accessibility. Removed some superfluous sections. ------------------------------------------------------ [2] Commander Keen's Universe (Also Known as The Meat) ------------------------------------------------------ Commander Keen's universe is also our universe, everything that is in his universe is in our universe, and everything that happens in his universe happens in our universe. Watch the skies. [2.1] Who or what is Commander Keen? Commander Keen is the alter-ego of eight year old Billy Blaze. When Billy dons his brothers' football helmet, he becomes COMMANDER KEEN! Defender of Earth with an iron fist. [2.2] What games has Commander Keen starred in? In addition to the seven Commander Keen games, Commander Keen has made cameo appearances in: The super-secret level of Doom II (level 32), in a message in Pickle Wars (it originally was planned to be an Apogee game). He is also found as a hostage in Bio-menace, in a puzzle in Paganitzu, and Commander Keen's helmet is found in a level of Crystal Caves. Someone named only as B. Blaze is mentioned in the Epic Games classic side-scroller game Jill of the Jungle. [2.3] Who are Commander Keen's friends? Unfortunately, Commander Keen has very few friends in his universe (that would suck, wouldn't it?), but here they are: [2.3.1] Marooned on Mars The Yorps: These lovable, one-eyed green Martians are friendly. Very friendly. Too friendly. Butler "Tin Can" Robots: A nice little Martian robot that has trouble keeping his hat on. He is nice except for the fact that he usually pushes you off a platform to your death. [2.3.2] The Earth Explodes Youths: These young Vorticons were sent into space by the Grand Intellect to grow into fierce warriors. They like to tear around and don't much care what gets in their way. These youngsters will most likely grow up to be Vorticon Elite. Vorticon Elders: Wise Elders are kept in stasis in the living quarters of the ship. They are from what is known as the Before Time, before the Grand Intellect. Scrubs: These little red robots perform various menial duties around the ship and can walk on almost any surface. [2.3.3] Keen must Die! Youths: The same spoiled brats that knocked you out in the second episode. Now they play a deadly game of jacks. Foobs: These little yellow creatures like to go out for strolls, whistling, and enjoy the day. Unfortunately, they are completely afraid of almost everything. If you touch them, they will grow so tense that they will pop. Messie: The great sea serpent of the legendary Loch Mess. Who knows if she even exists? [2.3.4] Keen Dreams Carrot Couriers: These couriers are in a hurry! Get out of the way or you might be pushed between a rock and a hard place! Pea Pods: They may look scary, but these guys are harmless. Just watch out for their offspring, the Pea Brains! Mosquitoes: Though annoying to most people, these mosquitoes don't seem to bother Commander Keen. The blue ones might even be helpful somehow. Children: Other children captured by Boobus Tubers' Dream Machine. They just sit and wave to our hero as he passes by. [2.3.5] Secret of the Oracle Bounder: These red, friendly, bouncing guys can be annoying, but they can be helpful, too! Council Member: These are the Gnosticenes you are trying to rescue. There are eight of them hidden in the depths of the Shadowlands. Inchworm: These placid yellow creatures are all over. Watch out where you step or they'll be afoot! Princess Lindsey: The Princess is here to help you out. If you can find her, she will give you valuable information that will help you complete your quest. Schoolfish: These fish are the real follow-the-leader types. [2.3.6] The Armageddon Machine Korath III Inhabitant: The denizens of the planet below the Omegamatic, these guys are just trying to go on with their day. Unfortunately, the Shikadi are making it very difficult. [2.3.7] Aliens ate my Babysitter! Flect: These fellows have big teeth, but their bite isn't the problem! Watch where you shoot when these guys are around. Blooglet: Baby Bloogs come in four colors: red, yellow, green, and blue. They aren't very dangerous, and they might even prove helpful sometimes. Molly: The object of your quest. The Bloogs are holding Molly for dinner. Viva: These are probably the most common form of life on Fribbulus Xax. Vivas have a wonderful quality-touching them improves your health. In fact, for every 100 you come into contact with, you'll gain another life. Watch carefully for Queen Vivas-touching one will give you another life all by itself. [2.4] Who are Commander Keen's enemies? Most of the aliens Commander Keen meets are mean, and hate him, and want him dead. Here's the lowdown. [2.4.1] Marooned on Mars Gargs: These wild-eyed, teeth-gritting Martian monsters are angry at you, angry at themselves, angry at dirt, angry at clouds, just plain angry. If Freud were to see them, he would call them the "Id". Vorticons: The Vorticons on Mars are members of a Mars outpost and are really on the bottom rung of the Vorticon social ladder. Being on an outpost has made them kind of tough. In the second two episodes, they are known as "Grunts". Tank Robots: These robots exist to kill any intruders. Even friendly ones. Pat-Pat: These enormous shelled enemies open and shut their mouths so quickly, if Commander Keen gets too close, he'll be bit right in half! [2.4.2] The Earth Explodes Grunts: These are the Vorticons from Episode One, but they have led a more posh lifestyle, so they are weaker. Vorticon Elite: These are Elite warriors. To show their loyalty to the Grand Intellect, they had their ears clipped. They are mean and like to shoot a lot. They wear blue and purple suits. Guard Robots: These awful purple robots are basically hovering machine guns. [2.4.3] Keen must Die! Grunts: here they are again, with red suits. Vorticon Women: They are very dangerous. They have big claws and breathe fire. You've come a long way, baby. Meeps: A race of green, egg-shaped, horrendously bad singers with sorely misplaced operatic intentions. They think they are the greatest singers in the world. They are wrong. VortiNinja: These are the most deadly enemy in this episode. Not only do they move and jump around very fast, they can also kick you! And to top it all off, they take 4 shots to kill. The Grand Intellect: His scary picture is framed on the wall of various Vorticon homes and schools. Who is he? Finish the game and find out! [2.4.4] Keen Dreams Frenchy: The french-fry tossing Frenchy is very dangerous. Watch out! Tater Trooper: The most common inhabitants of Tuberia, these bayonet carrying spuds almost always seem to be around. Pea Brain: The offspring of the Pea Pods look cute enough, but don't be fooled by that sweet face! They're pure evil! Squash: The squash (appropriately) try to squish Commander Keen when he walks nearby. Sour Grapes: These poor grapes are so sour at life, they'll fall off the vine whenever Commander Keen steps beneath them! Rotten Apple: These apples are rotten to the core! Be warned that they can climb poles too! Boobus Tuber: The King of Tuberia, this guy is huge. Seriously huge. He can jump as good, or better than you, so watch out! Killer Tomatoes: The mad tomatoes of Tuberia will try to eat you whole! Broccolash: Packing 125 lbs. of hair, Commander Keen better watch out where he steps to avoid being crushed! Spearing Asparagus: These dangerous vegetables run towards Commander Keen with their large, spiky forehead! Seeded Watermelon: Watch out for the black seeds shot from these fed up watermelons! They always seem to be in the most inconvenient places. [2.4.5] Secret of the Oracle Arachnut: Insane, green, crab-like walking creatures with two dangerous mouths! Berkeloid: This fiery fella is not to be toyed with. He throws big fireballs! Dopefish: The second dumbest creatures in the universe, this creatures thought patterns go "swim swim hungry, swim swim hungry." They'll eat anything alive and moving near them, though they prefer heroes. Gnosticene Ancient: These guys like to take your items and disappear. Lick: These blue beanbag-like monsters breathe a deadly lick of fire. Mad Mushroom: Dangerous plants that hop and are deadly to the touch. Mimrocks: Little creatures that look exactly like rocks, until your back is turned! Poison Slug: The most common inhabitants of the Shadowlands, poison slugs mean trouble twice - once if you touch them, twice if you should land in the puddles of poison they leave behind. Skypest: Virtually immune to your shots, these guys really are pests. There must be someway to get them, though. Sprite: Dopefish won't mess with these problematic underwater creatures: they shoot energy blasts at you! Wormouth: Watch out for these green menaces. They're a lot bigger than they look. Blue Eagle: These invulnerable eagles are only temporarily stunned by Commander Keen's Neural Stunner, not completely knocked out. In a few seconds they will get up and chase after Commander Keen. Don't break their eggs! A new blue eagle will be born! [2.4.6] The Armageddon Machine Sparky: This guy has a magnetic personality. His presence is electrifying. You'll be shocked when you see him! Watch out when he "charges!" Little Ampton: This purple fellow slides up and down poles and works on his computer terminals. Don't be on the pole he's on, `cause he slides up and down quickly! Slicestar: The slicestar is a crystalline being with razor-sharp points. Don't get near `em! Volte-face: Volte-faces are crazy, insane floating creatures that have electronic arcs for hair! Robo Red: Robo Red is a nasty guard. If he hears a sound, he shoots first and asks questions later. Avoid, avoid, avoid! Shelley: This tiny darling seams pleasant enough until you least expect it, then she goes all to pieces! Spirogrip: The spirogrip spins and launches toward walls. If you're in the way, you'll be toast! Shikadi Mine: Woe be the hero that wanders near one of these. They will follow you until you are close enough, then they explode! Spindred: Spindred slam angrily at the floor and ceiling. They'll crush you quicker...than something quick. Shikadi: These energy beings built the Omegamatic and plan to destroy the galaxy. Watch out for them near poles. Sphereful: Frightful plasma orbs with orbiting diamond sensors, tread carefully by these dangerous denizens. Shockshund: Three-legged energy dogs of the Shikadi, their spark is worse than their bite! Shikadi Master: The most frightful foe aboard the Omegamatic, they cast Electrospheres at you and teleport around. Very dangerous. [2.4.7] Aliens ate my Babysitter! Bloog: The Bloogs stole your babysitter. These one-eyed green carnivores are driven by their hunger across the galaxy. Bip: Bips are the cogs in the Bloog's machine. They run platforms, they patrol areas in their Bipships, and generally cause havoc. They will fight for anyone, but they happened to hook up with the Bloogs. Babobba: This little red fellow is a baby Bobba. Babobbas are not quite as tough as full-grown Bobbas. Blorb: These red gelatin-like beings are deadly but slow. They bounce around and make you nervous. Gik: This hard-shelled customer's worst points are its points! Its legs are spikes, so it will flip and try to poke you. Ceilick: These purple beings hid in holes in the ceiling and will try to get you with their forked tongues. Blooguard: These burly Bloogs have big clubs to bonk their enemies. Even if they miss, their clubs shake the ground so violently you might get knocked out! Bobba: Bobbas are nasty indestructible beings that hop and fire deadly energy bolts from their eyes. Nospike: These blue fellows walk around until they find something to charge at. But even charging, their favorite pastime, will bore them after a bit. Watch out for their fearsome horn! Orbatrix: These big blue eyeballs will bounce and spin at you! Be careful, they float and follow you. Fleex: The Fleex are amongst the finest engineers in the universe, having designed all of the buildings and devices on Fribbulus Xax. Unfortunately, the Bloogs built them, devastating the sleek and elegant designs. The Fleex have very sensitive eyes (a natural consequence of spending a lifetime in a basement lab), so sensitive that they have to wear dark shades when they're out in the light (making them nearly blind). To compensate, they've developed an oversized ear which allows them to hear other creatures as they move around. [2.5] What are the worlds Commander Keen visits? Keen visits quite a few planets on his journeys, here are the planets he's visited lately. Mars: Probably the planet everyone of Earth is most familiar with, this is where Commander Keen starts his legacy. He visits both the polar ice caps and the dark side of Mars. Commander Keen gets marooned when the Vorticons steal necessary parts of the bean-with-bacon Megarocket. Vorticon VI: A strange heavenly body, it is the home planet of the Vorticons. It is very similar to Earth, with the exception of the great fortresses created by their ruler, the mysterious Grand Intellect and the Vorticons. Commander Keen must find the Grand Intellect and stop his plans to destroy Earth! Tuberia: Kingdom of Boobus Tuber, the evil Dream Machine sends children into captivity when they say something negative about vegetables. Keen must destroy it or he'll be sleeping forever! Gnosticus IV: Home planet of the Poison Slugs, Ancients and Council Members. The evil Shikadi have imprisoned the invulnerable Council members in deep warrens of this forbidden place. Keen must rescue them or he'll have to say Goodbye Galaxy! Fribbulus Xax: Home of the evil Bloogs, Commander Keen must face incredible horrors and impossible odds to save his babysitter Molly. If he doesn't save her before his parents get home, Billy will have to tell them, "Aliens ate my babysitter." [2.6] How does Commander Keen get around? Commander Keen travels from planet to planet and from ship to ship using his interstellar starship made from old soup cans, rubber cement, and plastic tubing. The Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket! While exploring other worlds and ships, Commander Keen can use the Holy Pogo Stick he found on his excursion on Mars. Unfortunately, Commander Keen leaves his pogo stick behind when he is sent to Tuberia with the Dream Machine. [2.7] What goodies can I pick up on my journeys? The only thing better than accomplishing your main goal in Commander Keen is picking up the candy and items! Here's the complete list. [2.7.1] Marooned on Mars Lollipop: 100 Points Soda: 200 Points Pizza: 500 Points Book: 1000 Points Teddy Bear: 5000 Points Joystick: Manual Flight Control Car Battery: Electrical Systems Power Vacuum Cleaner: Ion Propulsion Unit (with carpet height adjustment) Everclear: Fuel Raygun: 5 Charges Holy Pogo Stick: Used for bouncing higher Keycards: Used to open 4 different doors [2.7.2] The Earth Explodes Candy Bar: 100 Points Vorta-Cola: 200 Points Hamburger: 500 Points Cake (Chocolate): 1000 Points Stuffed Toy Vorticon: 5000 Points Vorticon Hyperpistol: 5 Charges Keycards: Used to open 4 different doors [2.7.3] Keen must Die! Zitto Candy Bar: 100 Points Diet Vorta-Cola: 200 Points Big-N-Beefy Burger: 500 Points Cake (Double Chocolate): 1000 Points Stuffed Toy VortiNinja: 5000 Points Ankh: A mysterious super powerup. Use them wisely. Vorticon Hyperpistol: 5 Charges Hyperpistol Reloads: 1 Charge Keycards: Used to open 4 different doors [2.7.4] Keen Dreams Spearmint: 100 Points Chocolate Chip Cookie: 200 Points Candy Cane: 500 Points Chocolate Bar: 1000 Points Lollipop: 2000 Points Cotton Candy: 5000 Points Flower Power: 1 Shot Flower Pot: 5 Shots Magic Eyeball: 3 Lives and 8 Shots Boobus Bomb: 1 Shot, 12 destroy Boobus Tuber Key: Used to open doors [2.7.5] Secret of the Oracle Shikadi Soda: 100 Points Three-Tooth Gum: 200 Points Shikkers Candy Bar: 500 Points Jawbreaker: 1000 Points Doughnut: 2000 Points Ice Cream Cone: 5000 Points Neural Stunner: 8 Ammo in Easy, 5 Ammo in Normal or Hard Raindrops: Collect 100 for extra life Lifewater Flask Extra Keen Wetsuit: Allows you to swim in water Gems: Used to open 4 different doors [2.7.6] The Armageddon Machine Shikadi Gum: 100 Points Marshmallow: 200 Points Chocolate Milk: 500 Points Tart Stix: 1000 Points Sugar Stoopies Cereal: 2000 Points Bag O' Sugar: 5000 Points Neural Stunner: 8 Ammo in Easy, 5 Ammo in Normal or Hard Vitalin: Collect 100 for extra life Keg O' Vitalin: Extra Keen Keycard: Opens security doors Gems: Used to open 4 different doors [2.7.7] Aliens ate my Babysitter! Bloog Soda: 100 Points Ice Cream Bar: 200 Points Pudding: 500 Points Root Beer Float: 1000 Points Banana Split 2000 Points Pizza Slice: 5000 Points Neural Stunner: 8 Ammo in Easy, 5 Ammo in Normal or Hard Grappling hook and rope: Lets you climb something. Bloogstar Rocket Passcard: Lets you get through force field Really Big Sandwich: It's second biggest sandwich Commander Keen has ever seen. *[2.8] What's the name of Keen's pet yorp? At the end of Marooned on Mars, Commander Keen brings home a yorp to keep as a pet (see section [9.1]). There has, however, been some confusion about his name. Some feel that his name is Norp the Yorp. Others feel that his name is Spot (as his food bowl suggests). Tom Hall was asked to set the record straight: 'It's Spot, really. Billy was probably trying to give his parents something normal to hold onto since they let him keep a one-eyed alien as a pet. :)' And the matter is laid to rest. *[2.9] What's this I hear about Billy Blaze's extended family? You may have heard that Billy Blaze, a.k.a. Commander Keen, is related to B. J. Blazkowicz, hero of the Wolfenstein games. The following is an excerpt from the Wolfenstein 3D Official Hint Manual: William Joseph Blazkowicz was born August 15, 1911, to Polish immigrants. Blazkowicz was a top spy for the Allied Forces, receiving the Congressional Medal of Honor and other accolades for heroism. "B.J.," (as he was called by his friends) married after World War II, at age 40, to Julia Marie Peterson. Their son, Arthur Kenneth Blazkowicz, became a television talk show personality in Milwaukee. For show biz purposes, Arthur changed his last name to Blaze. Arthur later married Susan Elizabeth McMichaels. They had one son (which they named after Arthur's father), William Joseph Blazkowicz II, or as he signs his grade school homework, B. Blaze.... *[2.10] What is this 'dopefish'? The following is an excerpt from Joe Sigler's awesome Dopefish website http://www.dopefish.com: What is Dopefish? Dopefish was one of the characters that appeared in Commander Keen, Episode IV back in 1991. That's it. All the rest of this "Dopefish mania" came later. You can read about it...at dopefish.com, the definitive source of info on everyone's favourite fish! Dopefish is the product of the fertile mind of Tom Hall. It was one of 24 drawings he did of ideas for characters for Commander Keen: Goodbye, Galaxy! while part of id Software. Dopefish was one of the characters from these drawings that made the cut. According to Tom, "I just drew this stupid little fish," and the rest is history. It was pointed out to me recently that the Dopefish can predict the future. How? Well, the original Dopefish sketch referenced above was drawn back in 1990. Dopefish theologists point out that when the Dopefish was called into being by Tom, it made Tom have a foreshadowing of a future id release, Quake. You want proof? [On that original sketch, there was a Quake symbol.] Makes you think, doesn't it? Especially when Tom was no longer with id Software when they began work on Quake. Dopefish is described in the cast of characters for Secret of the Oracle as the second dumbest creature in the universe. His thought patterns go, "swim swim hungry, swim swim hungry." Dopefish "will eat anything alive and moving near them, though they prefer heroes." (What's the most dumbest creature in the universe? Why, of course, the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal. It's so stupid that it thinks if you can't see it, it can't see you. One way to avoid the BugBlatter Beast is to throw a towel over your head.) Dopefish was adopted" by the Tech Support staff at Apogee soon after I came on board. Then Steve Quarrella came onboard and it balooned from there. Dopefish was my favorite character, and Steve was the resident Keen expert -- Lee provided a few vocal effects and some art. We got hold of some screen capture software and went to town... So why is Dopefish so popular? Could it be his simple thought patterns (people always feel sorry for stupid animals)? His bucked-teeth? His tendency to burp? It beats me. But it really doesn't matter; everyone loves him. ------------------------------------------------ [3]The Official Commander Keen Games and Story's ------------------------------------------------ Every Saga has a story, every story has a beginning. This is Commander Keen's. [3.1] What's the Story Behind Invasion of the Vorticons? Billy Blaze, eight year-old genius, working diligently in his backyard clubhouse has created an interstellar starship from old soup cans, plastic cement and rubber tubing. While his folks are out on the town and the babysitter has fallen asleep, Billy travels into his backyard workshop, dons his brother's football helmet, and transforms into. COMMANDER KEEN - Defender of Earth! In his ship, the Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket, Keen dispenses galactic justice with an Iron Hand! [3.1.1] What's the Story Behind Marooned on Mars? In this episode, aliens from the planet Vorticon VI find out about the eight year-old genius and plan his destruction. While Keen is out exploring the Mountains of Mars, the Vorticons steal vital parts of his ship and take them to distant Martian cities! Can Keen recover all the pieces of his ship and repel the Vorticon invasion? Will he make it back before his parents get home? Stay tuned! [3.1.2] What's the Story Behind The Earth Explodes? His parents think he's asleep, but there's no time for napping - a Vorticon mothership is poised above Earth, preparing to destroy every major city with their deadly Tantalus ray! Keen must sneak aboard the ship and stop each Tantalus team from their terrible task. If he fails, the Earth Explodes! Of course, this means he won't have to get home in time for school... The Earth or no school. Hmm... After much deliberation, Keen decides to save the Earth anyway. Don't miss an action-packed second of this exiting episode in the Commander Keen trilogy! [3.1.3] What's the Story Behind Keen must Die!? Keen blasts through a hyperspace gate and arrives on Vorticon VI, landing on the island of Vortiville. Here he faces mind numbing horrors of suburban life. Then he will travel to New Vorticon, where life is a dark, dangerous enterprise. He will also have to face the violent forces massed in the Vorticon military installation. After this, he will face the impossible maze of the Caves of Oblivion. If he passes this barrier, he will finally reach the castle of the Grand Intellect, where all his beliefs and fears come together in a titanic, shocking finale! Don't miss the incredible shattering conclusion to the Commander Keen trilogy! [3.2] What's the Story Behind Keen Dreams? We find young Billy discussing matters of paramount importance with his mother. "I just saved the Earth mom," said Billy. "I don't have to eat vegetables." "Sure, dear," said Billy's mom. "I bet Neil Armstrong never complained about HIS mashed potatoes." "I bet Neil Armstrong never traveled to Vorticon VI and defeated the Grand Intellect, either," Billy mumbled at his plate. He sat there, legs dangling, staring at his offensive, starch-laden foe. After a pointed remark about the quality of the mashed potatoes, Billy was sent to his room. "Stupid Vegetables," he grumbled, his eyelids growing heavy. Soon Billy was fast asleep. Suddenly he woke up, and his bed was atop a hill. On either side of the bed were giant potatoes wearing metal helmets and holding bayonets. "Come with us Captain Keen," said the first. "You've been brought here by the dream machine," said the second. "Boobus Tuber our king and boss-" "-is now your master, come with us!" Billy frowned, grabbed his football helmet of his bedpost, and started to put it on. "First of all, spuds," Billy said pushing down on the helmet. "That's COMMANDER Keen. Second of all, who do you think you are?" "We're Tater Troopers it's plain to see," said the first. "So get-" Keen reached under his pillow and retrieved his Vorticon Hyperpistol. He moved it from "Stun," passed "Disrupt," all the way up to "Fry to delicate brown." "How about a walk on the fried side boys?" Keen said. Two BZZAPs later, Keen pouted. "Aw nuts. My Hyperpistol's empty," he said. Just then, a child in chains ran up to him. "Keen, oh, Keen, oh, Captain Keen! Save us from the Dream Machine!" he said. "That's COMMANDER Keen," the young genius corrected. "Whatever. Save us!" said the child. So Billy hopped out of his bed and started on his quest to defeat King Boobus Tuber and destroy the Dream Machine! [3.3] What's the Story Behind Goodbye, Galaxy!? [3.3.1] What's the Story Behind Secret of the Oracle? Billy Blaze toils in his backyard workshop, busily constructing his latest invention: the Photachyon Transceiver. Put in simple words, it is an instantaneous radio - point to anywhere in the galaxy, and you can pick up a signal as if you were right there. After picking up a lot of bad alien sitcoms, Billy hears a strange message, spoken in the language of Omnispeak that the Vorticons taught him. Brrzzz.giggg.oment of great triumph.frzzt.ast the Milky Way will be.huzzzzz.terly destroyed.pyuneeeeeeg.can stop us now. We will remake the galaxy in the name of the Gannalech. Power to our race! Power to the Shikadi! Then the radio is silent. "So the Shikadi are planning on destroying the galaxy, huh?" thinks Billy to himself. "Sounds like a job for...COMMANDER KEEN! Billy once again dons his brothers football helmet, contemplating three questions: Who the heck ARE the Shikadi? Where are they? How are they planning to destroy the galaxy? Climbing into the Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket's cockpit, Billy sets up the launch sequence for Gnosticus IV, the home of the Gnosticenes, guardians of the Oracle. They owe him a favor, and he needs to get some questions answered. The launch sequence begins. "Suppertime Billy!" announces his mom as she walks out to the workshop. "Ah, nuts!" spouts Billy. He realizes that there's not enough time to stop the sequence and cover the ship! Thinking quickly, he pulls out his Neural Stunner, points it at the door, and waits. One "Zzzzap!" later and his mom is frozen in the doorway. "Whew," says Keen "Honey? What's the matter?" says Billy's dad, coming out the back door. "Double Nuts!" mutters Billy. He peeks past his mom, takes aim and. Zap! Once at Gnosticus IV, a Council Page runs up to him. "Oh Captain Keen!" he begins. "That's Commander Keen," corrects Billy. "The Shikadi were here, and they kidnapped the Council members and sent them to the Shadowlands far to the west." "They didn't kill them?" Keen asks. "Impossible. They are immortal," says the Page. "So they just made sure they weren't available to activate the Oracle." "Well I'll just go get them," Keen says, turning with heroic determination. "Um, but Captain Keen, they also left a bunch of horrible creatures and traps to guard them," says the Council Page. "Well, I'll just go get them CAREFULLY, then," Keen says over his shoulder. Keen turns to walk out the door, stops, turns and addresses the page. "And if you call me Captain Keen again, I'm taking you with me." Keen boldly heads out the door as the page mutters, "Sorry." Commander Keen hops in his Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket and heads for the Shadowlands. [3.3.2] What's the Story Behind The Armageddon Machine? Last episode, our hero Billy blasted off in search of the mysterious Shikadi, who serve "the Gannalech" and plan to destroy the galaxy! After a short delay, Keen rocketed to Gnosticus IV, only to find the Council Members missing! The Shikadi kidnapped `em! Keen flew to the Shadowlands, faced horrible foes, and rescued the kidnapped ancients. After Keen freed them from their imprisonment, the Immortal Council Members activating their source of galactic wisdom, the Oracle. The Oracle informed Keen that the Shikadi had nearly completed a machine to obliterate the galaxy! This episode finds Keen in stealth mode, sneaking his Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket up to the Omegamatic. Securing his Attach-O-Ray to an exhaust port, Keen enters the Omegamatic and begins his most dangerous adventure yet! [3.4] What's the Story Behind Aliens ate my Babysitter!? In this episode, Billy is out in his clubhouse, busily working on his handy new CompuWrist wrist computer. He hears Molly, his babysitter, calling him to supper but he keeps on working. He hears a strange noise in the backyard and decides to investigate. On a patch of scorched grass he finds a note: Keen- Thanks for dinner. -The Bloogs of Fribbulus Xax. P.S. Next time get one with more meat, please. He puzzles over this for a moment, then notices the babysitter has stopped calling. Suddenly he realizes that aliens are having her over for supper-and when they say "for supper" they mean "FOR SUPPER"! If he doesn't save her, his parents will be furious. They'll never believe that "Aliens ate my Babysitter!" "This is a job for Commander Keen!" he declares. Once again, he dons his brother's football helmet, hops into the trusty Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket, and starts the launch sequence for Fribbulus Xax. He's got to save Molly from becoming a snack for creatures from another planet! It's great arcade action and hilarious fun in the latest episode in the Commander Keen saga! ---------- [4] Lyrics ---------- Like all good songs, the songs in Commander Keen, composed by Bobby Prince, have lyrics. Only the lyrics for two of the songs have ever been released, here they are. [4.1] Eat Your Veggies Here's some background. This song was originally intended for Keen Dreams, however Softdisk Publishing (who were publishing this "Special Edition" Keen), decided to get rid of music so the program would fit on one floppy disk. Anyway, Billy is sitting at the table with his family, refusing to eat dinner. It starts with his mom pleading with Billy, here goes. "You've got eat your vegetables, eat them right up! You've got to eat your vegetables, tell him Daddy." So his Dad tries to convince his son to eat. "You've got to eat your vegetables, NOWWWW!" Billy's sister, seeing an opportunity to make fun of him start's speaking. "You've got to eat your vegetables, na-na, na-na, na, na!" [4.2] Aliens ate my Babysitter! This song starts off right when Billy realizes the Bloogs have stolen his babysitter, and he's going to have to save her. "Aliens ate my babysitter, ate her right down to her toes, worse, they still look hungry, and are trying now to bite off my nose. My babysitter might have deserved it, of that, a Judge I'll not be, but I am a different story, the Universe dies without me!" Now Keen does some rap and here it is: "My name is Keen, a fighting machine, helmet on head (except when in bed), a pogo for height, a ray gun for might, the Bacon-'n-Bean's my flying machine. I never fear whenever I'm near, some critter from space, who's not in his place, I'll leave them to feed on whatever they need, I'll fill them with lead after they're fed. My Mom and my Dad don't know I'm this BAD! But when my story's told, all kids will be bold." ----------------------------------- [5] The Standard Galactic Alphabet? ----------------------------------- Unknown to most Earthlings, there is an alphabet standard throughout the galaxy: The Standard Galactic Alphabet! I'm proud to say that I figured out the Standard Galactic Alphabet (with the exception of Z), without any hints, when I was 8 years old. Using only Commander Keen episodes 1, 4, and 5. [5.1] What is the Standard Galactic Alphabet? The Standard Galactic Alphabet (SGA) is fairly easy to master. There is no upper and lower case, and the sign ·-· is used to signify the end of a sentence (like a period). *-----------------------------------------------------------------------* | A | B | C | DDDD | E E | FFFFF | G | HHHHH | I | | A A | B | | | E | | G | | I | | A | B | C | DD | E | F F F | GGG | HHHHH | | | A | B | C | DD | E | | G | H | I | | AA | BBBB | C | | EEEE | | G | H | I | *-----------------------------------------------------------------------* | J | K | L | M M | N N | OOO | P P | Q | | | | K | L L | M | N N | O | P | | R R | | J | K K K | L | M | N | O | P P | QQQ | | | | K | L L | M | N | O | P | Q | R R | | J | K | L | MMMM | NN | OO | P P | QQQ | | *-----------------------------------------------------------------------* | S | TTTT | | V | | X X | Y Y | Z | | | S | T | U U | VVVVV | W | X | Y Y | Z Z | | | S | T | | | | X | Y Y | Z Z |. ... .| | S | | UUUUU | VVVVV | W W | X | Y Y | Z Z | | | S | T | | | | | Y Y | Z Z | | *-----------------------------------------------------------------------* The SGA is used in all the Commander Keen game, with the exception of Keen Dreams (it's the kid in the middle, the one who never really fits in). ------------------------------------------- [6] The Hints, Tips, and Other Funny Things ------------------------------------------- Sometimes, we need a little helping hand to get on our way. Or maybe we just want a few pointers, or just want to exploit some bugs and/or see things we wouldn't normally see. If you're strange, and not like everyone else, skip this. Thanks goes out to Snortimer for the Commander Keen 3 flying trick, Cho'gall for the Maragia disappearing block trick, KeenCommander for the hovering Robo Red info, Kong33 for the info on the red flashing hand sign in Commander Keen 6, and Dark Hood for the translation of the Morse code message in the Bloog Control Center in Commander Keen 6. [6.1] What are some Hints for Invasion of the Vorticons? General Hints: Some places are only reachable by the pogo stick. It is wise to practice your pogo skills. "The Impossible Pogo Trick" is a trick that makes the game easier. How it works: walk or run in a direction, then press the pogo key, release it QUICKLY and press jump. You will pogo up and over at an angle that's not possible using any other method. In Episodes Two and Three, this technique is very valuable. All good Commanders know when to save their progress. On the World Map, press F5, and select a save position from 1-9. You can continue your game from the title screen, just select Continue Game, and press the number of your previously saved game. Conserve your ammo! If you can get past an enemy without firing, do it! You'll find this technique especially helpful in Episode Three, where you'll more than likely run out of weapon power if shoot everything that moves. Another useful technique is getting your enemies in between you and either a Tank Robot, a Guard Robot, or a Vorticon Women. More often than not, they'll get fried in the crossfire. You can use your pogo stick to avoid going into the Exit door. Before you start leaving, activate your pogo, and you won't get sucked in. Use this to get goodies behind the exit. Read the Signs, they give you invaluable hints (and a whole bunch of information you don't need). Use your common sense! If it looks sharp, pokey, or otherwise harmful to you, it probably is! Specific Hints: [6.1.1] Marooned on Mars Hidden Bricks: Look for little white dots, these are the upper-left corners of hidden bricks, look out for, and use them! They lead to many secrets. The Pogo Stick: After completing the first city, you should go to the Pogo Shrine (it's the little grey shrine). There you'll find, surprise, surprise, 'The Holy Pogo Stick'! Also look for hidden bricks above the Exit Door. The Hidden City: They Hidden City is accessible through the Red Maze City (the eastern most city, on the dark side of mars). At the bottom of the maze city (near the yellow key card) is a dark area. Fall past two fire pits, and hold down right. Next, hop from the hidden brick to the ice cannon area. Then get into the ice cannon's line of fire, and finally get launched over and go into the teleporter (it'll probably take a few tries). DIE!: If there's a sign that says DIE, something nearby will try to kill you (no kidding). The Tank: Get enemies between you and a Tank Robot, they'll be toast. Beating the Vorticons: You can get past all of the Vorticons without firing a shot, all it takes is a little practice: Joystick Guard: Go to the farthest right edge of the ledge below the exit (the one with a raygun on it). The Vorticon will go off the right edge, and plummet to his death. Car Battery Guard: Get him to follow you, and make him jump off the platform. Getting the Car Battery should now be easy as pie. Vacuum Cleaner Guard: Get the Vorticon to jump on the blue cylinders, and run underneath him, through the door. The Vorticon Commander (Guarding the Everclear): This is REALLY HARD to do without cheating, but possible (I've done it before, once). When he's over on the left side of the platform, climb up, and PRAY that he jumps high. If so, run quickly under him and over to the Teddy Bear. I only recommend you to do this if you feel the need to boost your ego. Otherwise, use a hidden brick to jump up on the huge block, and shoot the chain. Marooned on Mars: If you can somehow get past the Vorticon Commander using the before mentioned method, run into the exit without getting the Everclear. You'll truly be Marooned on Mars (you can't re-enter levels you have beaten)! [6.1.2] The Earth Explodes Pulling Switches: It's undocumented, but important. To pull switches or push buttons, press the pogo button when you are near. Tantalus Rays: Tantalus Rays are destroyed by using the pogo to hop up, and shooting the purple sparking cell in the glass bubble. WARNING: Don't stand to close to the switch when activating your pogo, you could pull it, and that ends the game (in a bad way)! Scrubs: The little red robots, Scrubs, can be jumped on for a ride up the wall. You'll find this technique VERY useful. Guards: The Guard Robots are deadly adversaries: Get an enemy between you and him. Vorta-Cola: You can stand on top of Vorta-Cola cans to get to higher places, and taking them may change the way the Scrubs walk. The Dark: The wise Vorticon will not jump in the dark. In fact, even unwise Vorticons will not jump in darkness. The Impossible Pogo Trick: Using "The Impossible Pogo Trick" jump on one of the Tantalus levels allows you to get to the top, avoiding all the nasty things below. Anti-Hero?: Keen can leave Rome's Tantalus Ray still active if he goes as far right as possible at the beginning, and hopping up the little hole. Someone Failed English: On the world map, the SGA labels Rome and Moscow are in the wrong places! In addition, on the far right side of the Paris Tantalus level, FUCL is spelt with the small colored platforms (though word is that in some versions the 'L' is a 'K'). [6.1.3] Keen Must Die! Simplicity: You need only to complete three levels to finish the game, but what's the fun in that? Go Up: On the Volcano level, follow the directions on the sign. Killer Opera: When Meeps sing, the sound kills, and can travel through anything. Even solid walls! VortiNinja: You can usually run under the VortiNinjas when they jump high into the air. In the Line of Fire: Line up a foe with a Sentry Gun, or a Vorticon Woman. They'll die in a jiffy. Up and Down: Remember, some falls are necessary, and some things are hidden in the heavens (think big clouds). Jacks: Jacks are almost always deadly, don't enter an area with them unless you have an Ankh, speaking of which... Ankhs: All Ankhs can be obtained. Oops!: If you look at the Blue Key in the Status Screen, it has a sky blue aura around it. Weird! Fly Without Cheating: It's possible to fly in the air without using a cheat. Just press jump and then fire at almost the same time. You'll waste a few bullets, but it's good for getting to tough places when you don't want to cheat. The Boss: On the final level, you can stand on the shoulders. (I don't want to give away too much, now do I?) [6.2] What are some Hints for Keen Dreams? The Down Jump: You can jump through logs by holding Down, and pressing the Jump button. Flower Power!: If you miss an enemy you are trying to shoot, you can recollect your Flower Power shots for a short period of time (the same is true for Boobus Bombs). Mosquitoes: You can stand on the Blue Mosquitoes, but not the black ones. Boobus Bombs: If you see the message `Boobus Bombs Near!' when the level is loading, find and collect them. You need at least 12 to defeat King Boobus Tuber. Quick Ending: If there isn't a cement wall in your way, go against the right wall, AND DIE! If Commander Keen's head goes through the right edge of the screen, you'll complete the level (and if you miss, it's your problem). [6.3] What are some Hints for Goodbye Galaxy!? General Hints: Don't use two button firing, it makes it even more impossible to do the "Impossible Pogo Trick" (which is done by running, and hitting the pogo and jump keys in rapid succession). To jump through a hole in the ground, look down and hit the jump key (this is known as the "Down Jump"). If you just don't make a jump, you can usually grab the edge and hang on (as long as it's not on a diagonal slope). You don't have to pull up right away if you grab an edge, take a long breather if you want. To erase the high scores in Commander Keens 4 and 5, delete the CONFIG.CK4 and CONFIG.CK5 files respectively. You'll also have to reselect any changes to joystick or game settings, as this information is also stored in the CONFIG files. Save the game often, you'll be glad you did. If you're having jerky motion problems, or having "snow" fly across your screen, select the Fix Jerky Motion and SVGA Compatibility options on the Configure - Options screen. Read the Signs! Specific Hints: [6.3.1] Secret of the Oracle Hidden Platforms: There are many hidden platforms in Commander Keen 4. You can see them flash in the sunlight every few seconds (NOTE: These are usually VERY hard to see, but if a flash catches your eye, be sure to look). I want to live!: There are seven free keens available on the first level. Outside the Pyramid: You can get to the top of the Pyramid of the Moons. I'm talking the outside! And on the subject of Moons... Don't Moon Me!: If you stand on a shaded moon in the Pyramid of the Moons for a few seconds, Commander Keen will moon you! Suck it up Princess: Princess Lindsey appears twice. Flashy!: There's stuff hidden very well in Hillville, all you need is a flash of insight. More Moons!: The way to the Pyramid of the Forbidden is at the bottom of the Pyramid of the Moons. (Remember, the Inchworms will be afoot, but how many?) Mmm...: The Dopefish likes to eat the small Schoolfish that follow you. Faster! Faster!: The jump button makes you swim faster underwater. Splat!: The Skypests can be squashed by jumping on them with your pogo stick. Mr. Mime!: You can only shoot Mimrocks when they are jumping at you. The Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket: If you're running really low on ammo, a trip to The Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket may be beneficial. Hee Hee!: Mad Mushrooms leap higher on the third bounce. Not So Invisible: When you hang on the ledge of the disappearing ice blocks in Miragia, you won't fall down...even if it disappears! So if the blocks start disappearing, quickly grab the ledge of one of them and climb onto it again when it reappears. [6.3.2] The Armageddon Machine Let there be Life: There are NINE lives available in the first level (but don't expect them to be easy to find). Egotism: The names of the two level designers, John Romero the Software Engineer, and Creative Director Tom Hall, are hidden in two of the levels. Naughty Tom!: The enemy name 'Little Hampton' is actually far dirtier than it would first seem. Tom Hall says this: 'Some British TV show referred to a guy with a... um, small... you know... as having a "Little Hampton". That stuck in my head when I was naming stuff, I guess.' The Swastika: In Version 1.0 of The Armageddon Machine, in the Energy Flow Systems, there is a Swastika above John Romero's name. However (probably due to public outcry), it was removed by Version 1.4. This must be set straight! Here's what Romero himself had to say about the incident: 'Obviously, it was a reference to Wolfenstein... ? Sure, Keen 5 was created before Wolfy, but we knew that was our next project.' Tom Hall, creator of Commander Keen, further expanded on that point: 'I think John put that in as a reference to Wolfenstein, not to imply anything about any character's ideology. Same as when he originally had the swastika shape in DOOM, that folks go so upset about that took it out. As if that meant anything remotely like condoning the atrocities of Hitler. (Remember kids, Hitler bad. Hating groups of people for no reason, very bad. Killing people for the same no reason, very very very insanely bad.) If Wolfenstein had had a logo, like a big "W" or something, then John would've made that shape, I'm sure.' Points!: There are 30 000 hidden points near the start of Defense Tunnel Sorra. The QED: You can't destroy the Quantum Explosion Dynamo directly, you'll have to find something (or someone) to destroy it for you. I'm Flying!: It's possible to make Robo Red hover off the end of a platform. I'll leave it up to you to figure out though... Korath III: The way to the secret level is through the Gravitational Damping Hub, look down and translate. The REAL Ending: To see the real ending of Commander Keen 5, you have to do something on the Korath III Base. It's just that Easy: There are problems on Korath III if you're playing in the "Easy" difficulty level. In earlier versions of Commander Keen 5, after a few seconds of play in the secret level, the game would quit and you would get the error message `Goplat moved to a bad spot: 2114,1600'. In Version 1.4, it isn't possible to see the "Real Ending" because, well, you'll have to find out for yourself. Fuses: You probably figured this out, but you break the fuses by using your pogo stick. Duck!: You can duck the nearly invincible Slicestars and the rather vincible Volte-Faces, but not Robo Red. He's too big and evil!!! More on Robo Red: You can stand next to Robo Red and not get shot (you can sometimes duck them too), but then you're next to him and that can't be good. Sentries: You can stand on the horizontal Sentry Guns to get to higher places. Slicestar: The Slicestars can be destroyed! The ones moving on a set path take 20 shots to be destroyed, but the Slicestars that just bounce around take 45 shots to destroy, and are hardly worth the time, energy, and ammo since they're easier to avoid then their slow moving counterparts. Even More on Robo Red: Robo Red's hearing is very good, and if he hears a noise, he'll shoot first, and ask questions later. *[6.4] What are some Hints for Aliens ate my Babysitter!? Many Secrets: There's more to do at The Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket than it seems (notice that you can't exit the level on the right side). Important Items: There are three very important items that Commander Keen needs to get to complete his quest. They are located in The First Dome of Darkness, Bloogfoods, Inc., and Bloogton Tower. The Secret Level: The way to the Blooglab Space Station is through the Bloog Control Center (and I mean THROUGH it). The SGA: The entire Standard Galactic Alphabet is hidden in the Blooglab Space Station. Blooglets: You should feel no remorse for wasting a Blooglet. They like to hang on to their corresponding Gem Key Color. Sentries: Like in Commander Keen 5, you can stand on top of the Sentry Guns (just watch out for their shots). I'm Falling For You!: If you can get Nospike to charge off a cliff, he'll fall to his death. It's almost too easy! Ceilicks: Watch out for a little tip of a tongue, it's a Ceilick hidden up in the rafters! If you find yourself underneath one, shoot up immediately (any later, and you'll be dead already). Blooguards: Jump up as a Blooguard swings his club in the air, you won't be stunned by the shock wave. The Hand: Some levels have areas with a red flashing hand sign. This indicates a dangerous area that isn't necessary to enter to complete the level. Code Cracker: In the Bloog Control Center you can hear this Morse code playing in the background: SOS SOS DE KEEN SOS SOS K. High Score: If you use the Warp Cheat and go to the High Score screen, you get the message: Keen is in the High Score screen. Call Id! What could this mean? Who knows? Patience: This game is quite hard! Patience and ingenuity is the key. The Other Key: The KEY to success in the Blooglab Space Station is to FALL in love with Molly because she's DROP-dead gorgeous. Rescue her quickly, before she DECENDS to the stomach of a Bloog (it seems I'm beating around the bush here). Read the signs! ------------- [7] The Codes ------------- Sometimes we need a few codes to help us out, and that's okay. KEY+KEY means hold down both keys at the same time (e.g. F10+G means press and hold F10, and then press G. If it worked, you'll usually see a confirmation message). [7.1] What are the Codes for Invasion of the Vorticons? Code Description C+T+[Space Bar] Gives you a Pogo Stick, all 4 keycards, and 100 Raygun Charges Shift+Tab Allows Commander Keen to pass through one City on the World Map G+O+D Activates God Mode (Invulnerability) and unlimited jumping height with the Pogo Stick [7.2] What are the Codes for Keen Dreams? Code Description F10+I Gives you 99 Keys and 99 Boobus Bombs F10+S Slow Motion Toggle F10+J Gives Commander Keen unlimited jump height until you hit your head or let go of the jump key F10+G Toggles God Mode F10+W Warp to Specified Level. See below for list Level List Number Level 0 The Land of Tuberia 1 Horseradish Hill 2 The Melon Mines 3 Bridge Bottoms 4 Rhubarb Rapids 5 Parsnip Pass 6 Level 6 7 Spud City 8 Level 8 9 Apple Acres 10 Grape Grove 11 Level 11 12 Brussels Sprout Bay 13 Level 13 14 Squash Swamp 15 Boobus' Chamber 16 Castle Tuberia *[7.3] What are the Codes for Goodbye Galaxy!? Code Description KEEN4 /TEDLEVEL ?? This is a level practice or KEEN5 /TEDLEVEL ?? mode that gives you infinite lives, type it at the DOS prompt. Where "??" is, insert the level number (see below). Completing the level or choosing an option on the Control Panel other than Paddle War! or Return to Game will lock up the system. T+A+B Cheat Option! You get all 4 Keys, 99 Shots, and an Extra Life E+N+D Finishes the game for you! F9 Boss Key (causes the screen to look like the DOS prompt, just in case the boss comes by while you're playing). A+2+[Enter] Master cheat. TYPE THIS FIRST to use the following cheats. F10+E Returns to the World Map, finishing the level F10+T Sprite Test F10+Y Debug Mode, this allows you to see all secret areas (the normal looking walls) F10+I 3000 Points, all the Keys, 99 Shots and the Wetsuit (in Commander Keen 4) F10+P Pause F10+S Slow Motion Toggle F10+G Toggles God Mode F10+J Toggles Jump Cheat (gives Commander Keen unlimited jump height) F10+N No Clipping Mode Toggle (allows Commander Keen to go through anything) F10+B Change Border Color F10+V Add VBLs F10+C Object Count F10+Z Game Over! F10+M Check Memory Usage F10+D Create a Demo F10+W Warp to specified level (check list below) Level List Secret of the Oracle Number Level 1 Border Village 2 Slug Village 3 The Perilous Pit 4 Cave of the Descendents 5 Chasm of Chills 6 Crystalus 7 Hillville 8 Sand Yego 9 Miragia 10 Lifewater Oasis 11 Pyramid of the Moons 12 Pyramid of the Shadows 13 Pyramid of the Gnosticene Ancients 14 Pyramid of the Forbidden 15 Isle of Tar 16 Isle of Fire 17 Well of Wishes 18 Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket The Armageddon Machine Number Level 1 Ion Ventilation System 2 Security Center 3 Defense Tunnel Vlook 4 Energy Flow Systems 5 Defense Tunnel Furrh 6 Regulation Control Center 7 Defense Tunnel Sorra 8 Neutrino Burst Injector 9 Defense Tunnel Teln 10 Brownian Motion Inducer 11 Gravitational Damping Hub 12 Quantum Explosion Dynamo 13 Korath III Base 14 N/A (Causes game crash) 15 High Scores 16 N/A (Causes game crash) 17 N/A (Causes game crash) 18 N/A (Causes game crash) [7.4] What are the Codes for Aliens ate my Babysitter!? Code Description KEEN6 /TEDLEVEL ?? This is a level practice mode that gives you infinite lives, type it at the DOS prompt. Where "??" is, insert the level number (see below). Completing the level or choosing an option on the Control Panel other thanPaddle War! or Return to Game will lock up the system. F9 Boss Key (causes the screen to look like the DOS prompt, just in case the boss comes by while you're playing). E+N+D Finishes the game for you! F10+I 3000 Points, all 3 Items, all 4 Keys and 99 Shots F10+E Return to Fribbulus Xax F10+T Sprite Test F10+Y Debug Mode, this allows you to see all secret areas (the normal looking walls) F10+P Plays Extra Life music, and Freezes the game. Press Esc to quit F10+S Slow Motion Toggle F10+D Record a Demo F10+G God mode toggle F10+C Object Count F10+V Add VBLs F10+B Change Border Color F10+N No Clipping Mode Toggle (allows Commander Keen to go through anything) F10+Z Game Over! F10+M Check Memory Usage F10+J Toggles Jump Cheat (gives Commander Keen unlimited jump height) F10+W Warp to specified level (check list below) Level List Number Level 1 Bloogwaters Crossing 2 Guard Post One 3 First Dome of Darkness 4 Second Dome of Darkness 5 The Bloogdome 6 Bloogton Manufacturing, Inc. 7 Bloogton Tower 8 Bloogfoods, Inc. 9 Guard Post Two 10 Bloogville 11 Bloog Aeronautics and Space Administration 12 Guard Post Three 13 Bloogbase Recreational District 14 Bloogbase Management District 15 Bloog Control Center 16 Blooglab Space Station 17 Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket 18 High Score -------------------- [8] The Maps -------------------- Woe be the Gamer who needs to consult this to complete one of the Commander Keen Games. If you are one of these Gamers who needs this section, TOO BAD! Even I have a sanity level: you'll have to settle with the World Map from Keen Dreams. [8.4] What's the Layout of Keen Dreams? Map of THE LAND OF TUBERIA ********************************************************************* * Boobus Chamber * * ! * * -------------Castle Tuberia-------------- * * ! ! ! * * ! ! Brussel Sprout * * Grape ! Melon Mines Bay * * Grove ! ! ! * * ! ------------------!---------------------- * * ! ! ! * * ! ! ! Squash Swamp * * ! Apple Acres Horseradish ! * * ! ! Hill ------- START ! * * ! ! ! ! * * ! Spud City ! Parsnip Pass * * ! ! ! * * Rhubarb Rapids-------------Bridge Bottoms---------- * ********************************************************************* Okay, it's not a work of art, but you get the idea. Look forward to more maps in forthcoming versions. --------------- [9] The Endings --------------- The Endings! I strongly suggest you actually experience the endings of each of the Commander Keen games for yourself, just having the words isn't the same. Read on, not much more to go! [9.1] What's the Ending to Marooned on Mars? Commander Keen returns to the Bean-with-Bacon Megarocket and quickly replaces the missing parts. He must get home before his parents do! Keen makes it home and rushes to beat his parents upstairs. Shh, honey.let's see if little Billy is asleep. Billy.? are you A-WHAT IS THIS ONE-EYED GREEN THING IN YOUR ROOM!!!!??? Ah, Mom, can't I keep him? We'll talk about it in the morning, son, you get some rest. OK Mom. Goodnight. Goodnight, dear. But there is no sleep for Commander Keen! The Vorticon Mothership looms above, ready to destroy Earth! To be Continued. [9.2] What's the Ending to The Earth Explodes? After disabling the weaponry of the Vorticon Mothership, Billy heads for Earth. Even great space-heroes need a nap after defeating a vicious horde of violence-bent aliens! The Vorticon ship limps back to Vorticon VI to tell of their defeat at the hands of Commander Keen. The Grand Intellect will not be pleased. Wake up, Billy. It snowed last night! There's no school! Wonderful, Mother. That will give me time to rid the Galaxy of the Vorticon menace and discover the secret of the mysterious Grand Intellect! Ok, hun, but you'd better a nourishing vitamin fortified bowl of Sugar Stoopies first. Ok Mom. To be continued. [9.3] What's the Ending to Keen must Die!? No. It can't be! Mortimer McMire!!! Mortimer has been a thorn in your side for as long as you can remember. Your IQ test score was 314-Mortimer's was 315. He always held that over you, never letting you forget for one day. All the practical jokes, the mental cruelty, the swirlies-each memory makes your teeth grit harder. And now he's out to destroy Earth! You have had enough! "Alright Mortimer, what's the problem? Why destroy Earth?" "You and all those mental wimps deserve to die! I'm the smartest person in the galaxy. Aren't I Mister THREE FOURTEEN! Ah, ha, ha!" "I'll get you for that, Mortimer!" "Come and try! You'll never get past my hideous Mangling Machine! Prepare to die, Commander Clown!" With Mortimer McMire out of the picture, and his brain-wave belts no longer controlling them, the Vorticons are free from their mental enslavement. "Commander Keen, in honor of your meritorious service in freeing us from the Grand Intellect's mental chains, I and the other Vorticons you haven't slaughtered want to award you The Big V, our highest honor." "Thank You!" The End. For now! [9.4] What's the Ending to Keen Dreams? Yes! Boobus Tuber's hash-brown-like remains rained down from the skies as Commander Keen walked up to the Dream Machine. He analyzed all the complex controls and readouts on it, then pulled down a huge red lever marked "On/Off Switch." The machine clanked and rattled, then went silent. He had freed all the children from their vegetable-enforced slavery! Everything around Keen wobbled in a disconcerting manner, his eyelids grew heavy, and he fell asleep. Billy woke up, looking around the room, the early morning sun shining in his face. Nothing. No vegetables to be seen. Was it all just a dream? Billy's mom entered the room. "Good morning, dear. I heard some news on TV that you'd be interested in," she said, sitting by him on the bed. "What news?" Billy asked, still groggy. "The President declared today National `I hate Broccoli' Day. He said kids are allowed to pick one vegetable today, and they don't have to eat it." "Aw, mom, I'm not afraid of any stupid vegetables," Billy said. "But if it's okay with you, I'd rather not have any french fries for awhile." THE END [9.5] What's the Ending to Secret of the Oracle? Wow, this is really an impressive way to activate this monolith of ancient wisdom. click Everyone be silent. The oracle is about to speak. Hmmm. Maybe it's got a dead battery or something. The Shikadi are a race of shadow beings from the far side of the galaxy. They are building an Armageddon Machine and are planning to blow up the galaxy with it, then rebuild it to suit their needs. They live on the third planet of the Korath system, which is 71, 000 light-years from Gnosticus IV. The Armageddon Machine is almost complete. And this is what they look like. These Shikadi are toast! Thanks for the scoop, Oracle. I'm outta here. I hope it doesn't rain on my folks.. Meanwhile, back on Earth. To be continued. [9.6] What's the Ending to The Armageddon Machine? CONGRATULATIONS You have completed "Goodbye, Galaxy!" Commander Keen has saved the day once again! But things are still in motion.. With their Quantum Explosion Dynamo in ruins, the Shikadi rush to their getaway ship and hightail it back to their own galaxy. *Due to a freak fuse malfunction, they cannot take off and are arrested by the Korath III Police for double-parking. Keen rummages through the control room of the QED for clues as to why the Shikadi wanted to blow up the galaxy. He stumbles upon a note written in the Standard Galactic Alphabet. DEAR BILLY YOU FELL FOR MY ANDROID DUPLICATE PLOY IN THE MANGLING MACHINE AND NOW YOUVE FALLEN FOR IT AGAIN IM BLOWING UP THE UNIVERSE NOT THE STUPID GALAXY THIS WAS JUST A BIG DISTRACTION DODO TAG YOURE IT MORTIMER PS GANNALECH IS HOW THESE DUMB SHIKADI PRONOUNCE GRAND INTELLECT OR DIDNT YOU NOTICE THAT MISTER THREE FOURTEEN Keen takes the note with him to decipher on the long space voyage home, not seeing anything else of interest.. Back at home after having saved the galaxy, Billy feeds his rain-soaked parents ice cream and gently shakes them back to consciousness. Hopefully, this won't affect his allowance. See you Christmas '92 when Commander Keen returns to battle for the universe! It'll be the biggest Keen ever! You won't believe your eyes! Thanks for playing! * When you do something special in the Korath III Base, this sentence is added. [9.7] What's the Ending to Aliens ate my Babysitter!? "Gee, thanks Billy," said Molly. "Boy, my brother is gonna get in trouble for this." "Your brother?" Keen asked. Molly is the older sister of his former nemesis, Mortimer McMire. But he was caught in the explosion of his Mangling Machine...wasn't he? Could he be alive? "But he's. he's." "He's in trouble is what he is. He told the Bloogs to take me hostage. In exchange, he told them where to find the Stupendous Sandwich of Chungella IV." "Yeah, I've seen it," Keen said. So, Mortimer's back eh? thought Keen. "Where IS Mortimer?" "Oh," said Molly. "He said something about blowing up the entire universe or something. Well, let's get back before your folks get home." "Yeah, we'd better-THE UNIVERSE?!" Keen said. "Yikes!" See you next time, when Commander Keen and Mortimer McMire battle for the universe! Thanks for playing! ----------------------- *[10] The End of it All ----------------------- It's been a strange journey returning to, and updating, this FAQ. The original version was written over three and a half years ago. Since then, my writing style has completely changed. Comparing original sections to updated sections, you'll probably notice a huge clash in the way it's written. I've completely changed too. I said things in this FAQ that I'd never dare write these days. Heh, I don't even remember the last time I played Commander Keen. No matter though. Got any questions or comments? Send them to flaose@classicgaming.com. Thanks for reading! When will this FAQ be updated again? The next time I get bored. -Dave --------------------- [11] Acknowledgements --------------------- These are all the people that have helped me along the way and inspired me. If I missed you, I apologize in advanced, just don't attack me with a trout for it! First and Foremost, Tom Hall - How could I not thank this guy? He's the Big Brain behind Commander Keen, he created him and his universe! All I can say is, thanks Tom. Everyone Else in Alphabetical Order Bill Amon - Bill created the first Commander Keen FAQ, and inspired me to make a better one :). Adrian Carmack - He may not like it, but he digitized the entire Commander Keen Universe on the computer screen. John Carmack - John has held onto the Commander Keen rights all these years (I think he secretly loves Commander Keen). Ben Cruz - One of my partners in crime with CC314. You know I love ya buddy! Andrew Durdin - For creating the best utilites to edit Commander Keen with! Get them at http://jump.to/keen/ Derek Greentree - Creator of the amazing Rise of the Triad FAQ. He's who truly inspired me to create this massive document. Thea Gregory - Thea's been a good friend, helped me when I was down, gave me encouragement, and kept me from going crazy. John Romero - Created some really great levels for Commander Keen, he actually answers questions and fan mail! Joe Siegler - Joe's put up with me over the years, answering my questions, explaining to me a million times that the Universe is Toast was cancelled by id, not Apogee, and not getting too crazy about it. He's a great supporter of Commander Keen and has an awesome and funny webpage on the Dopefish from Commander Keen 4: Secret of the Oracle: http://www.dopefish.com/ Geoff Sims - Geoff may be the sole reason Commander Keen's still around today, the founder of Cerebral Cortex 314, he has inspired many a people and projects. Tore Stubhaug - My other partner in (cc314 inspired) crime :D You - For reading this enormous and comprehensive FAQ. ----------------- *END OF DOCUMENT* ----------------- +--------------------------------+---------------------------------+ | _|\_ | |\ _,,,---,,_ | | \ / \ Pisces Swimeatus | ZZZzz /,`.-'`' -. ;-;;,_ | | |>< |> OO The Dopefish | |,4- ) )-,_..;\ ( `'-' | | / \___/UU | '---''(_/--' `-'\_) | +--------------------------------+---------------------------------+ 'I just drew this stupid little fish.' - Tom Hall