Contest #81: August 9th to 22nd, 1999


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The winning entry was submitted by Richard Navarro. It was:

"'Twas the night before release day, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even Steve's mouse.
Chris Johnson's all snuggled up, in his new found bed,
while visions of Duke Forever danced in his head."

Some of the others (in no particular order): 

  1. (Dreaming): Yes, my darling Pamela this big house expensive wine and collection of sports cars was made possible by my hard work I do at 3D Realms. (Nathan Foote)
  2. What you don't see is the famous painter, Jacque Le Chacque, painting a nude portrait of Chris in that pose, using nothing but flat-shaded polygons. (Steven Roy Michelson)
  3. Chris, heading up his first Apogee Bored Meeting, is obviously elated. (Tom Baxter)
  4. Chris dreams of the day he can go out and be just like his hero Duke Nukem. The day he can go out packing and kick ass all day long, then at night settle in with one of the many beautiful ladies who just flock him. Instead of the way things are now, shouting profanities at professional wrestling on tv and looking at playboys. (Duane Shields)
  5. After years of resistance, Chris's soul is finally sucked from his body by Windows... (Jeff Yeackle)
  6. As you can see, down here in Texas, EVERYTHING'S BIGGER. Here, we got a big project, with a big coder, taking a big nap. (Michael Russell)
  7. "Wake me when Joe gets the camera caption winners posted." (Steven Roy Michelson)
  8. I wasn't sleeping, I just wanted to see what I would look like with gills! (Clinton Johnson)
  9. "I've fooled so many people with this 3D Studio Max box into into thinking I use it like my hero Paul Steed. If they only knew I really don't like Paul Steed and I use Lightwave because 3D Studio Max sux." (No name submitted)
  10. Chris Johnson slept, as visions of motion-captured strippers lap-danced in his head. (John Wetzler)
  11. Wanting to bring DNF to new heights of realism, Chris Johnson does some intense research to help him with modeling the inside of Duke's eyelids. (David Delmont)

In reality, this is Chris Johnson asleep at his desk.

NOTE: Again, I got about 100 submissions all saying more or less the same thing.  This time it was some variant of "So this is why 3D Realms is taking so long on Duke Nukem Forever".  :)