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Discuss this contest here ]
The winning
entry was submitted by Ian Brumm. It was:
 *voice of girl*
"AWWW You shouldn't have, A REAL Matt Wood doll for Christmas,
Complete with wood, look." *points down*
Some
of the others (in no particular order):
-
Hey Matt! It's only fun if SHE puts
them on and yells "Open the present". (Emanuel Masciarelli)
-
Ha-ppy Birth-day, Mis-ter Brou-ssard,
Ha-ppy Birth-day to you. (Jorge Rodriguez)
-
With an assist from his soon to be
ex-girlfriend that would haunt him for the rest of his dating
life, Matt wins the game of charades as a team mate finally
guesses "Pee Wee." (Trey Burns)
-
Disheartened at the lack of a
Christmas tree Matt decided to take matters into his own hands. He
grabbed some ornaments and his girlfriend started placing the
tinsel. (Chris O'Connor)
-
"What! He lied to me. Good things DO
NOT come in small packages!" (John White)
-
Keeping in tradition of great Duke
items like the Steroids, Shrinker, and HoloDuke, 3DRealms is proud
to introduce the newest addition: Atomic Nipples. (Nick Hutzler)
-
Matt and girlfriend practicing for
their porno scene in the Max Payne sequel: Payne Comes Again (Kirk
Quinbar)
-
"My mom warned me about games
programmers" (Justin Heyes-Jones)
-
Gosh, I wish I had three hands, that's
why I bring my girlfriend everywhere. (Brian Bernard)
-
"For the upcoming Duke Nukem Forever,
3D Realms has decided to be an equal opportunist and has added
male strippers to the game." (Phil Dixon)
-
Matt goes insane with happiness after
finding Charlie's secret porn stash by accident. (David
Livingstone)
-
Girlfriend: (sung to twinkle twinkle
little star)
twinkle twinkle little stars
how i wonder where you are
up above his breasts so high
held in place by my stoned guy
twinkle twinkle little star
how i wonder.. there you are!
*looks down and finds third star* (Brian Chang)
In
reality, this is Matt Wood & his girlfriend clowning around at one of
our company Christmas parties.
And of course, we can't forget this Xenophage entry:
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